I Blame Him
by bulletproofloneliness
Summary: Ron left. Harry & Hermione are stuck together and Harry realizes something. DH SPOILERS! HxHr
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and co. (If I did, Ginny & Harry wouldn't live happily ever after together.)

A/N: This happens somewhere between Chapter 16 of Deathly Hollows, before they go to Godric's Hollow. If you don't like the pairing of H/Hr, don't read this.

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I don't exactly know why I'm back here. Back in this place that's haunted with all these memories, memories of feeling unloved, neglected and alone. The second I left this useless excuse for a home, I wanted to put this behind me and forget about all of it. But now, as I look out the window and onto the empty streets of Privet Drive, all these painful memories suddenly come back to me.

It's almost 4 in the morning and I still can't sleep. I've tried my best but I just can't relax. My mind is racing. All the memories this house has is running through my head. Memories of being Dudley's punching bag, living in the cupboard under the stairs for about 10 years, being practically starved to death by Aunt Petunia before my 2nd year in Hogwarts… all those memories... they all came back. Teasing me, showing my weakness and haunting every move I make here. Plus, my plans on how to get the next few Horocruxes and destroy them would occasionally enter my already confused brain. I'd have random flashbacks on the things that happened in my 6 years in Hogwarts and it hurts because I miss it so damn much. I felt protected. But here, I'm just a target. And then, there she is, Hermione. Adding up to everything else I have to deal with.

Honestly, I blame Ron. This is all his fault. He's the one who left us in the first place.

_Stupid ungrateful git_. I mumbled as the picture of him walking out on us and disapparating flashed in my mind.

Yes, he expected something more from me. I expected more on his part. And we all expected things to fall into place. But it just didn't work out that way. What could I do? It wasn't easy at all. I was trying the best I could. Hermione was too as she figured out the book Dumbledore gave her. Hermione felt the same as Ron. But she didn't leave me, now did she? Atleast I know I can count on her.

But, it's not just the fact he left us that annoys the hell out of me. If he didn't leave, none of this would have happened. Being alone with Hermione has opened my eyes to certain things. I noticed the small things she does. Like how she'd tilt her head to one side when she didn't get a bloody word I said or like when she was frustrated, she'd chew on her nails a bit. I never noticed this before.

If Ron didn't leave me here with her, I would never have realized how I truly feel about my dear best friend, Hermione Granger.

_Damn it, Ron! Why'd you just have to leave?! Because of you, I'm in love with the girl that was meant for you!_

I punched the wall lightly in frustration to make sure I didn't wake up Hermione. We chose to sleep in one room incase the Death Eaters decide that I might want to come back to my old home and get thing I might have forgotten. Actually, I had no plans of returning. This was all Hermione's idea. Ron just left a few days ago and we had no clue where to go next. We were at a loss. So, we just came here.

I turned to look at her. After those countless nights where she was just lying awake, crying because Ron left, she was finally able to sleep soundly on my bed while I was now lying on this mattress we put on the floor. I sighed. She looked beautiful. I actually doubt there was a time wherein she didn't look pretty. I guess... I just never realized it up until now.

I know I'm not supposed to feel this way towards Hermione. She's my best friend... and she's like a sister to me. (Or so I thought) And besides, she and Ron have this really confusing thing together. But right now, I couldn't care less. Ron's not here. He can't do anything to me. And no matter how much I want to, I can't stop what I'm feeling.

I stood up and made my way towards her. I wanted to get a better look. Actually, I just wanted to kiss her and hold her tight in my arms. But like I said, it's just plain wrong. I can feel my heart pounding in my ears as I sit on the chair beside her. I couldn't help but stare. I know it's as if I am obsessed but her beauty just casts a spell on me and for some reason, I can't look away.

I removed the hair covering her face and tucked it behind her ear. As I did, she gave a small sneeze. My muscles suddenly tensed.

_Please don't wake up. Please don't. _

Thankfully, she pulled the blanket closer to her and went back to sleep. I smiled to myself as I got up and looked through the letters Hermione and Ron used to send me. I was desperately trying to find something, anything, I could do so that my thoughts of Hermione would leave.

_She's Ron's. Ron likes her. She likes Ron. It's so obvious. She doesn't like you, Harry. Get that into your thick head!_

Sleep started to take over me as I convinced myself that Hermione and me will forever just be a fantasy. I sighed as I lay down on the bed, my back facing her. I couldn't stand watching her sleep.

As I closed my eyes, I heard a small voice say, "I love you."

_Don't get too excited, Harry. She's just dreaming. It's just a dream. Remember, it's not you. _

Of course it's not me. Deep down, I know it's Ron she's talking to in her dream. But a part of me is still hoping. Hoping that she would love me and not Ron.

If only.

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A/N: There you go! I hope you liked it. I'm not sure if I'll continue it or not. I might put up a next chapter. Either in Hermione's POV or I'll just continue where I left off. Reviews are welcome.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I wish I owned Harry Potter and co. But I don't. J.K Rowling does. And since she does, Harry and Hermione together will remain just a fantasy to me.

A/N: Same setting as Chapter 1 but, Hermione's POV. Enjoy!

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It's 6 in the morning. My head is throbbing as I sit up from his bed, watching him sleep soundly on the mattress.

_Look away, Hermione. Look. Away. Harry belongs to Ginny. They kissed on his birthday. Remember? So, stop your thoughts. He'll never be yours. _

No matter how much I scold myself, I just can't find it in me to look away. I mean, have you seen him? When he sleeps, he looks so at peace and relaxed unlike how he is when he's awake, always trying to find a way to end the war. He's always trying to be the hero. In one word... he's just… wow. Everything about him just completely takes my breath away.

I quietly tiptoe out of the room and onto the hallway. I noticed he has no picture at all in any of the frames hanging on the walls. As I touch the cold railing of the stairs, I can feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I then start to wonder how it must have been for him to live here. Well, if it really does count as living. I've always wondered how he was here. How he'd act, how he'd deal with everything they threw at him. Literally, and figuratively.

_This useless excuse for a family doesn't deserve him. He's always caring… thinking of others before himself... and he's obedient… he's perfect… and yet… they tortured him._

He'd tell us stories about it, but it didn't seem enough for me. I really wanted to know his past here. I guess the main reason why we're here is so that I could learn more about him.

In fact, I was always curious about the boy named Harry Potter. He was famous, almost everyone loved him. But, why was he always so closed up and reserved when it came to his life before he realized he was a wizard? Ever since our 1st year, I had this secret crush on Harry. Maybe that's what stimulated my curiosity. At first, I firmly believed t was just a small crush. But year after year, it would unfortunately get stronger and stronger.

_You're an idiot, Hermione. Did you know that? Loving someone who'll never love you back. You're just pathetic._

In our 4th year, I tried to use Viktor to make Harry jealous. Harry didn't seem to even care about the fact that I'm, in Ron's words, "fraternizing with the enemy". But the fact that I spent a lot of my time with him that year made me fall even harder for him. Then I had to watch him drool over Cho Chang in our 5th year. Damn did that hurt me.

But by 6th year, I decided that I had no choice but to give up. He was with Ginny, one of my closest friends. I couldn't break them apart. They were happy with one another. I didn't want to ruin that for them. When he's happy, I guess I have to be happy too. Then Ron was there. Everyone said we were perfect for each other, so I gave it a shot. I don't think I would ever love him the way I love Harry. Ron was just at the right place at the right time. So, I thought I forgot all about Harry and the feelings I once had for him. But you wouldn't believe how wrong I really was. It came back. Those feelings I've tried to hide for so long returned. I didn't ask them to, they just did.

And honestly, if someone were to be blamed, it would be Ron. I think it's his fault why my feelings for Harry returned. I mean, he was the one who left us hanging! Yeah, we were both disappointed with what was going on, but Harry needed us. And I could never abandon him.

_You're so stupid, Ron. You left us. I can't believe you'd actually do that._

When Ron left, I cried. I cried like hell. At first, I cried because Ron was gone. I thought I loved him, so it was a natural reflex. But then, I spent even more time alone with Harry. He'd talk to me and try his best to cheer me up. He was there when I felt so alone. And somehow, my reason for crying changed completely.

I was crying because I realized that my feelings for Harry never left me at all. Instead, those feelings became stronger and more alive than ever before. And because of that, I realized that Harry would never be mine. I know it seems so shallow but I love Harry with all my heart and it just kills me inside knowing that he's happy with someone else and not me.

I blinked away the tears as I made my way around the kitchen, searching for food we could eat. I started singing to myself as I was cooking bacon making sure my thoughts don't wander back to Harry.

Suddenly, I heard a banging of a door and footsteps running down the stairs. I turned around and Harry rushed towards me and hugged me tightly.

"Hermione! I thought something bad happen to you! I… I woke up… and... you weren't there… I thought they got you. I was so worried." Harry stammered, refusing to let me go.

"I'm fine, Harry. Don't worry about me. I just decided to cook some breakfast. You want?" Harry nodded and I prepared his breakfast smiling at the fact that he actually cared about me.

"This is the best thing I've eaten since we left Kreacher! You're amazing, Hermione." Harry said his mouth full of food. I couldn't help but turn a light shade of red. He was one of the few people who complimented me on my newly acquired cooking skills.

Then, it hit me. I know he heard me talking in my sleep a while ago. I'm so sure he heard me say "I love you." But how in the world do I tell him that I was actually awake as I said it? How do I tell my best friend that it was meant for him all along and not Ron?

I sighed. If only he loved me back.

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I hope you like it! So I have one last chapter for this story. Reviews are loved. Take care, everyone!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Hey everyone! Well, here's the last chapter. I really intended this whole story to be a short one. Thanks to everyone who reviewed. So... this discredits a certain part in Deathly Hallows and also the epilogue. This is in Ron's POV.

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God. I'm not that stupid and ignorant. I know they thought that I wouldn't notice the changes in them as I returned. They thought I wouldn't notice their stolen glances, or how protective he got over her all of the sudden. They didn't think I'd see that when she was scared, she'd call for him and hold on to him. I bet they thought that I'd never figure it out how they'd smile at each other then suddenly turn away to blush. I bet they themselves didn't notice that their hugs would last longer than they used to and that they were slowly but surely falling for one another. But you know what?

Even if they didn't notice it, I did.

And finally after waiting for what seemed like forever, she came clean. She told me the truth. Hermione and I were making our way back from the Chamber of Secrets, one more Horocrux was destroyed, and in our arms were basilisk fangs. We couldn't wait to tell Harry what we did. We were running as fast as we could making sure that nothing would happen to the basilisk fangs when she suddenly she stopped me. I looked at her with this questioning look in my eyes.

"Ron, I have to tell you something."

For some reason, my heart skipped a beat as she said that. "What is it?"

"I…" she paused, unsure if she should complete her sentence or not.

I could feel my ears get hotter and turn red. Excitement was building up inside of me. What I noticed before between them seemed to be forgotten as she was about to tell me what I thought she would. I don't know, maybe it was this certain tone in her voice that made me hopeful that somehow, she'd feel the same way I did.

_She's going to say it. I know it. Don't look too eager, Ron. Keep a straight face until she tells you. _

I was ready to explode.But then… she just had to complete her sentence.

"I… I'm in love with Harry."

And just like that, my world came crashing down like our family's flying car that we trashed in our second year in Hogwarts. I was stunned. I thought it would be me. I pretended to be happy. I forced on a smile and I tried not to talk to talk to her anymore. My heart just couldn't take anymore pain.

_Don't worry, Ron. Harry loves Ginny anyway. So when Hermione sees that, she will give up on him and come running back to you. It's a perfect plan. And all you have to do is sit and watch it unfold before your very eyes. _

I reassured myself and focused on the battle that was right there in front of us. Harry explained a few things and before I was able to digest everything, we were running to the Room of Requirement. And just before we entered, my hand on the cold brass door handle, it happened.

Hermione had kissed Harry, dropping the basilisk fangs on the ground. The girl I love is kissing my best friend. And he was kissing her back.

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It's been a little more than 3 years since that horrible day. And up to now, it still haunts me. I just couldn't believe what happened. When I'd think about it, everything after that would just seem like a blur to my memory. All I know is, I lost her. I lost her to the Chosen One. I lost her to the Boy Who Lived.

"Ron? Are you ready?" Ginny asked, banging on my door. "Mom is looking for you!"

I stood up, sighed and said "I'm ready as I'll ever be."

Luckily enough for Ginny, she didn't take it as hard as I did. She ended up being the fiancée of that git, Draco Malfoy. Who thought that evil little Death Eater actually have the ability to love?

"Do I have to go?" I moaned as my mom helped me with my new dress robes that looked a hundred times better than what I wore to the Yule Ball in our 4th year.

"Of course you have to go, Ronald dear. You're his best man."

I shrugged. It's not like I asked to be the best man. But Harry and I were the best of friends. It was kind of expected that I'd be his best man. And I couldn't let him down again.

I walked out of the house and onto the backyard. There were tons of people there. People from Hogwarts, the ministry, even people I didn't know were there. Even Hermione's former love, Viktor Krum, was there. They wanted to have a simple wedding so they decided to have it in our backyard. And of course, my mom happily agreed. To her, and I guess every Weasley there was, they were technically part of the family already.

I'm not mad at them for what happened between them. Honest. I'm not. If anything, I'm the one to blame. You see, I thought of it this way, all of the changes that happened occurred when I returned. They must've fallen for each other while I was gone. It's my fault because I left them together. Alone. No one to interfere with their feelings they had for each other.

I glanced at my watch. The wedding was about to begin any minute now. I smirked as I saw George and Katie Bell, their fingers intertwined. They've been married for 2 years. Their son and my first nephew, Fred, was busy playing with Teddy Lupin who was now almost 4. I looked to my left and there was Ginny with Draco.

_I…are they? Oh bloody snot they're snogging!_

"Oi! Malfoy! Get off my little sister! There are people watching! There are little kids here! Their eyes are burning because of what you're doing to my sister!" They broke apart and Ginny just cast a glare at me.

I felt someone put his hand on my shoulder and said with an amused tone in his voice, "You know, bro, you better get used to seeing that. After all, they are getting married in a month or so."

"Yeah, I know, Bill. But it's just sick and wrong."

Bill laughed. "I remember when she couldn't even stand looking at him. And now, she's about to marry him. Well, better take our places now, the wedding is about to start." I watched Bill leave and take a seat beside Fleur and their daughter.

I sighed. Everyone was so happy. Why couldn't I learn to be happy too even without her in my life? I have to move on. Harry smiled as I took my place beside him. The pianist started playing and everyone turned around as Hermione appeared. She looked beautiful. Everyone was stunned. I saw Harry's jaw drop a bit. Ginny even elbowed Draco squarely in the stomach to stop him from staring.

_Harry is one of the luckiest guys on Earth. _I'm sure every other single guy was thinking the same thing I was as Hermione made her way across the aisle.

As the wedding ceremony started, I just couldn't focus. The words seemed like buzzing noises to me. And everything was a blur. My thoughts were just focused on her. But I knew she was thinking of someone else.

_It's all your fault. If you haven't been a git and abandoned them, they wouldn't have fallen for each other. It's called karma, Ron. _

There was a sudden silence. "Ron, the ring!" Harry whispered in my ear as I snapped back into reality. I hadn't realized that we were that far into the wedding.

"I love you, Hermione." Harry mouthed as the priest said his final words.

Hermione blushed slightly and smiled. "I love you too."

And once again, I felt a painful pang in chest. I hated watching her go.

They kissed. They were officially married. She was officially his.

_If only I never left. _

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A/N. And there you go. Hope you liked it! Reviews please! Take care, everyone:


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